Friday, June 1, 2012

Pregnancy Is Kind Of Hilarious. Installment #1

I realize this notion of mine all depends upon what you find hilarious. I have never been very "normal," so let's just roll with it. 

It's amazing the comments from strangers or acquantainces that go hand in hand with pregnancy...I find myself internally laughing my ass off at most of them.

Upon leaving my office this afternoon to take a quick little shopping trip, I ran into a girl I briefly used to work with. This girl & I were never close, just more or less acquaintances. However she works in the same industry as I do now so I see her ocassionally. Anyways, no sooner than we'd said our "Hello's," she looks straight down at my stomach and says, "Are you pregnant?? Please God say you are."

"Yes, I am." I smiled and she seemed to breath a sigh of relief, to which I find hilarious. She has balls, I don't.  I say, why put yourself in that position? What if I had a tumor? What if I'd gained a little bit of weight and it all just went to my lower stomach?! 

Ok fine, I don't look like this:

Thanks goodness.

Nor do I looks like this:


But still. I guess I just wouldn't risk asking on the very off chance I was wrong. I have heard women say that if someone has always had a flat stomach and all of a sudden they are sporting a very obvious pooch, and haven't gained weight anywhere else, then it's safe to ask. But what if it was a tumor?! LOL I can see it now...."No, I'm not pregnant, I have a tumor, stomach cancer in fact." Wouldn't you feel awful?!

That's why I say don't ask.  

Ok maybe if you look like this.....

But we all don't have Alessandra's body.

For reference, here's my bump today @ 22 weeks.

It could be a tumor.

A tumor that kicks ;)